


i wish i was the moon

by misswongs



Category: Final Fantasy VII
Genre: Angst, Canon Universe, Childhood Friends, Cloti - Freeform, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, One Shot, Romance, Set in FF7 Remake!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-18
Updated: 2020-04-18
Packaged: 2021-02-23 13:17:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,259
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23712133
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/misswongs/pseuds/misswongs
Summary: “What you said last night, about… about staying in Midgar,” she pauses, feeling his eyes upon her even though she doesn’t dare to look back. “Did you really mean it?”Cloud lets out a long sigh, blinking at the way she shivers, her whole body shakes at the way the wind ruffles her hair in all directions. His hand twitches upwards, but manages to keep it still, keep it from doing something very stupid.He decides to look away.“I’m many things, Tifa,” he hesitates. Tifa knows this isn’t a good moment to think of such things, but she can’t help liking the way he pronouns her name, his voice always breaking into a whisper midway through, like he’s gasping for air, like her name alone takes his breath away. She feels stupid just by thinking of it, feels terribly embarrassed. “But I wanna believe I’m a man of word. I made you a promise, so I’ll do my best to keep it.”Cloud and Tifa share a moment together in Sector 7 after being unable to sleep — taking place in FF7 REMAKE, spoilers of the game! Cloti. One-shot.
Relationships: Tifa Lockhart/Cloud Strife
Comments: 18
Kudos: 246





	i wish i was the moon

**Author's Note:**

> *SCREAMS*
> 
> I'M SO HAPPY I GOT TO WRITE THIS!!!!  
> writing has been a challenge for me lately since i decided to take it slow and only write when i wanted to, i've been doing this for so long that i think it got very monotonous for me, but this game got me screaming c-l-o-t-i all over the place and i was so inspired i couldn't resist, i was listening to Tifa's theme from the remake ost while writing this *sobs quietly* i'm in love with the arrangement and i'm so grateful for all the cloti moments we got in the game, it's more than i expected.
> 
> anyway, i hope you enjoy it! leave a kudo&comment if you liked it, and go play the game!!!! it's amazing
> 
> also, this fic is for shar, of course, who else? shar i love u bb i hope you enjoy this <3

* * *

**«oh, i wish i was the moon**   
**so that i might be with you, one more time**   
**i wish i could disappear, 'cause i know i can't stay here**   
**with or without you»**   
_—i wish i was the moon, ewan j phillips._

**—o—**

Silence can be many different things.

Sometimes it is hollow. Other times, quite uncomfortable, almost awkward. But it isn’t quiet, and if you were to ask Cloud Strife about it, he’d say it is ridiculously loud. Like a black hole swallowing everything around it, absorbing your every breath, your every heartbeat. 

Silence was often like that when he was around Tifa Lockhart. 

That night, the darkness of the room engulfs him more strongly than his own brighter demons. He doesn’t know what time is it, how much sleep did he get, how much time left he had until morning but he knew, quite firmly, that he wouldn’t be able to sleep again.

It was a bad habit by now.

Cloud sighs, rubbing his eyes and sitting on the mattress, contemplating his possibilities. He _could_ try to get some sleep again, but it was pointless, and he didn’t want to face more dreams about Sephiroth.

He didn’t want to face many things.

Resigned, he stands, looking around for his sword and deciding to go around for a midnight walk, hoping it would tire him enough to persuade him to go to bed again. He opens the door of the room, welcoming the fresh yet poisoning air of Sector 7, when a figure sitting on the stairs stops him midway. 

The door lies halfway open, his hand frozen around the handle, and the sight of Tifa is the first thing that he notices. She’s sitting there, at the stairs, staring at the sky with her legs pressed against her chest, her arms tightening around her knees like she’s embracing herself. Silence strikes him again, he stays there for a second, and after a moment of hesitation he walks outside, closing the door behind him. The sound makes Tifa’s face turn around in surprise, her eyebrows lifted in confusion. Their eyes meet, hers looking tired and puffy, and they’re speechless for a few awkward seconds.

Then she smiles.

A sweet, caring smile, and Cloud takes a deep _secret_ breath, because although there are many things he doesn’t remember quite well, he surely remembers what Tifa’s smile feels like. He just doesn’t know what to do with it. 

“Hello,” she says, quietly, welcoming him in.

Cloud takes a step forward, placing his sword against the nearest wall.

“Can’t sleep?” he asks, and she watches as he approaches, slowly, wobbling slightly on his feet. In the moonlight she can fully see his face. His eyes look tired, cold and puffy from his unsuccessful sleep. He takes a seat by her side and Tifa moves a bit, allowing him more space, but their shoulders are almost touching and Tifa’s eyes linger there, at the space between and what little it takes to have their skins graze each other.

“Mmmh,” Tifa sighs, looking up at the sky. “I had a nightmare.”

Cloud looks down, nodding in contemplation. 

“Yeah,” his whisper merges with the wind, becoming one. “I get those too.”

He’s close enough that she senses the scent of tousled bed sheets in his hair, the smell of blood and metal, the smell of a warrior that looks so little like the guy she used to know. When he said he’d become a SOLDIER, she never thought it would mean… _this._ Cloud finds her staring, and Tifa realizes that the space between them is almost nonexistent, and that staring at him this way isn’t the same as staring behind the counter of her bar, where she’s safe and guarded by her comfort zone. This is different, and it hurts that it feels that way, because it didn’t use to be like this. 

Tifa blinks in the darkness and rapidly turns her gaze away to the sky, swallowing hard. Her hands shake a little, so she keeps them both firmly locked around her knees. 

“The sky… looks nice,” she mumbles, realizing it’s a stupid statement. The sky in Midgar never looked nice, polluted by Mako and shielding the _real_ sky from everyone’s eyes. There was nothing but a dense, greenish layer of mist up there. The thought makes her reconsider. “Sometimes I stay outside the bar, looking up and hoping to see at least one star. Haven’t had much luck lately, to be honest.”

Cloud’s gaze is fixed in the sky too, his brows meet in the middle and there’s only one thing he can remember, one thing he can see in the silence that engulfs them both.

A night laden with stars. 

Her blue dress, all legs and long hair. 

A promise.

The wind picks up, making his eyes blink softly.

“I guess we’re not in Nibelheim anymore.”

His comment makes her heart skip a beat, her lips part in a silent gasp and her hands tighten more firmly around her knees because it’s the first time Cloud mentions their hometown to her since… since… 

Tifa sighs, pushing the thought away, she didn’t need more reasons not to sleep. Instead, she stares at the empty sky, the quiet town around them, the sound of the cats meowing in the distance, the sound of Cloud’s breathing beside her. It feels nice, this little spot right here, for a moment it belongs to them just like the water tower did many years ago. Tifa wonders if they can have another thing for themselves again, something to call their own.

Neither of them makes a sound for a while, and silence can be many things, but it isn’t quiet. Sitting beside her feels loud and clear, her presence has a voice, it keeps him buried into the grown, unable to run away even if he wanted to. 

Cloud isn’t exactly sure of what he wants at this point.

Tifa breaks the silence, as she always does. She’d never been that good at staying quiet, even as kids. They used to play this dumb game back in the days when the streets of Nibelheim felt duller than ever. It didn’t have a name, but Tifa used to call it the _silence game_ , the one who kept silent for the longest period of time was the winner. Of course, Cloud had mastered it in a matter of seconds, and Tifa used to try really, really hard to follow, but she would always break in the middle, distracted by the smallest of things.

_Look! There’s a frog in there!_

_Tifa, you’re talking._

_What? Oh, no! I’m sorry!_

The memory made him ache. He hadn’t remembered that in a long, long time.

“You know,” her voice breaks through the barrier of his mind, and he looks at her. She’s now embracing herself, a tint of sadness lingering in her eyes. “After you left the village, I used to climb the water tower all the time to watch the stars at night. Used to count them all, wondering if you could see them at Midgar too. Imagine my disappointment when I first came here and found nothing.”

She lets out a short chuckle, gazing down at her knees.

Cloud blinks at her, her eyelashes kissing her cheekbones, seems like she’s overthinking. The past… it isn’t something he enjoys talking about, something he enjoys remembering. But he also doesn’t enjoy ignoring her, or acting like he doesn’t care. Because he does, and sometimes that’s the problem.

Besides, he made a promise.

And he _will_ keep it, even if it kills him.

“I’m sure we can find a new spot somewhere to watch the stars. Maybe we’ll be lucky this time.”

Tifa shivers when his voice comes off strong and steady, like he wants her to hear him loud and clear. They’re so close, her shoulders nearly brush against his and she almost wants to lean in, just a bit, just to touch him. Tifa lifts her gaze at him and finds him staring, a smirk on his lips, a faint spark in his SOLDIER eyes. 

It’s a promise.

Tifa returns the smile, and the block of ice that stands between them suddenly feels thinner, it’s starting to melt. She sighs, tucking some strands of her long hair behind her ears. 

“Cloud…”

He rests his elbows on his knees, looking at her sideways.

“Hmm?”

Tifa hesitates, gazing down and playing with her fingers.

“What you said last night, about… about staying in Midgar,” she pauses, feeling his eyes upon her even though she doesn’t dare to look back. “Did you really mean it?”

Cloud lets out a long sigh, blinking at the way she shivers, her whole body shakes at the way the wind ruffles her hair in all directions. His hand twitches upwards, but manages to keep it still, keep it from doing something very stupid.

He decides to look away.

“I’m many things, Tifa,” he hesitates. Tifa knows this isn’t a good moment to think of such things, but she can’t help liking the way he pronouns her name, his voice always breaking into a whisper midway through, like he’s gasping for air, like her name alone takes his breath away. She feels stupid just by thinking of it, feels terribly embarrassed. “But I wanna believe I’m a man of word. I made you a promise, so I’ll do my best to keep it.”

She’s quiet for a moment, tracing the skin of her arms with her finger. 

“I didn’t think you would remember that. Our promise, I mean.”

He’s so close to her now, he can feel the heat of her body enveloping him and shielding him from the cold of the night. The wind brings locks of her hair to his shoulder, his arm, her perfume impregnating on his skin. His heart is beating so fast he’s scared she might hear it, and it’s quite funny because Cloud left his room with the intention of tire himself up, but right now he’s never felt more awake. 

Sitting beside her used to feel easy, he thinks. At least, that’s how he remembers it. Why is it so different now? What’s changed?

She speaks before he can think of anything else to say.

“Having you around again… it feels good. I’m less worried now that you’re here, especially after last night. I really don’t want you to leave just yet.”

They used to do this all the time. Sitting together in the middle of the night, sharing their feelings, their worries, their thoughts. It was simple, easy, as natural as taking a breath. But they’re big now, and their battles grew bigger in size too, and their worries, and their thoughts, and maybe their feelings too.

Cloud licks his bottom lip, feeling light and kind of dizzy. She wanted him here. She wanted him to stay. 

“A promise is a promise,” he mutters, and she looks at him, and he’s unable to keep his eyes away from her face. Under the faint spark of a streetlamp her skin is glowing, her eyes too. “If you need me here, then I’ll stay.”

Slowly, her lips curve into a tender smile. Everything about her is so tender, so soft. Her voice, her smiles, her every demeanor. He’s blushing. Is he blushing? He can’t tell, but his face feels hot all of a sudden. Dammit.

“And how much will that be?” she teases, breaking into a cute little giggle. 

Cloud can’t help but look away immediately, trying to hide a smile that slowly becomes a chuckle and failing miserably. Tifa laughs a little harder. He’s smiling, he isn’t the type yet now he is doing it, and Tifa can’t help but feel proud of herself. He’s smiling at something she said. 

“Don’t worry,” he follows the game, sighing once more at the sky in a dramatic surrender. “I’ll make you a discount.” 

Tifa laughs again, bumping her shoulder against his in a playful manner and that alone is enough to make his legs wobble like jelly. What the hell.

“Good,” she says, nodding and standing up to stretch. Cloud gulps very loudly and tries to keep his eyes on his hands. “Because if I have to replace more water filters I think I’ll die.”

He smirks, breath heavy and face warm, she climbs the steps until she reaches the top.

“We better go to sleep now. If not, I won’t be able to function tomorrow morning.”

“I’m… staying here a little longer.”

“Oh,” she says, hesitating. “Okay then.”

For a moment, Cloud thinks she’s leaving without saying goodbye. She opens the door to her room and he hears a noise, she’s searching for something. After a while, she returns with a pink blanket. Without a word, he observes the way she walks down the stairs to where he is to place the blanket on his back. 

Now everything is filled with her smell.

Cloud turns around to look up at her. She’s smiling.

“Goodnight,” she pats his shoulder twice and leaves, closing the door behind her.

He blinks, startled, looking down at the fabric covering his body, warm and soft. He touches it, frowning at it, like he’d been given a very important piece of materia he needs to use wisely in battle.

Softly, his eyes return to the empty sky above.

_When we’re older, and you’re a famous SOLDIER, if I’m ever trapped or in trouble, promise me you’ll come and save me._

_Promise me._

Cloud sighs, empty of breath.

“I promise, Tifa.”


End file.
